After quite a few Months

life's getting busier these days..and i haven't step in to this blog after a long, very long time..slightly forgotten. Everything rounding up to eat me..huh sighing would be a good relief for this short time...jobs, life, routine, really pressing me down...kinda out of idea how to distress myself..now, in front of my screen, and screaming at my innocent blog. keeps me wondering and questioning what i want to do next..a lot of things inside my mind now..think i just wanna rest the whole day. should i sleep? maybe....later i want to go salon to cut my hair....maybe...stressed out, i gotta loosen  a bit...says who..say myself....indulge myself with soothing music, wahhhhh...can't wait for it anymore....

Misfortune

what a misfortune... got robbed in the middle of the day...fortunately, i only lose my cell. and it is so lucky that me and my another person is fine..that two bastard, you just wait for the repayment...i am sure that you gonna get something from your wrongdoing..anyway, i didn't give it a damn, because my cell is already broken..so, fine, just took what you want. you think you are super cool huh..well, if i ever met you again, I'll spit at your face..really, you just triggered my anger. If i really want to, you might be dead yesterday. And you are lucky that i still hold myself back. Don't let me see you again..and, take this as my words, you really are dead!!!!!! just wait for God's punishment....then, you'll know..by doing that, you've just humiliated the entire planet as a guy. Coward, chicken, should have shot you at your penis or maybe you just don't have one. Sorry, harsh words but uhhh i've got to put my anger out...maybe, in the future i must learn martial arts for myself..and, robber, thieves, you won't have ur chance anymore. I'll get all of you..

Uncertainty

Uncertainty that makes us wait...uncertainty that turn us upside down..uncertainty that trigger our anger, anguish, terror, fear, inferiority etc..I never knew it until i experienced it myself. I saw a lots of broken heart bleeds because of uncertainty. and that's it, period...

Standing Order..

it has nothing to with law nor non-law fact. I just made it up myself...These few days feels certain joy in this place where i'm doing practical here. Met a lot of sporting peoples and can't expect too much on my students. After all, 7 weeks left and felt nothing but can't wait to go back to my hometown. To redeem my time with my family back at Sarawak. Goodbye Peninsular and Tanjung Malim, surely going to miss a lots of thing I created at this place. This place taught me a lot, I'm very thankful. I want to share all the knowledge I get from my lecturers and others that taught me a lot in future students. Should i say how much the university had helped me to find myself. Next time, I would go for the best and do the best for my fellow students. Can't wait to learn and become a good teacher in the future.

Thank You..

Thank you for a wonderful day..wonderful morning...wonderful wake up...thank you very much. With You by my side, I am thankful for every meaningful moment we go through together. You will always be an important person for me. Up till that very certain day, I promise You will still be the one..Even the stars would change and years would pass by but there is nothing that can change my feelings for You. Strengthen me when I am weak and forget about our promises. Remind me always how much we meant very much to each other. Especially, how much you meant in my life.

That from this moment on, You will be the reason for my life. Beneath my life, my dream and my love, You will be there for me. And don't leave me even when sometimes I ignore You and turn my back on You. That every day I woke up, Your name would be the first thing I think of. I know that this road I've took for You is hard and I know that everybody will go against me, however I believe that I've made the right choice. You taught me how to laugh, how to cry, to have faith, to be persistent and no matter how ugly my life turn in the middle of everything, You love me most. Thank You.....

Nightmare of Nightiangle..

They said if you have repeated or the same nightmare almost every night then, something really hard is bothering you...couldn't be so sure with the statement or fact. Maybe it is just something that people made up. Maybe it is just doesn't exist since then. But, should i tell the story here, maybe it is true that something big is bothering me. I don't know what it is but let the story of my dream or so-called nightmare justify itself..I had this dream of our family (the whole family) come to visit our neighbor. Things were alright at the beginning, when suddenly I felt strange about someone inside the house. The grandfather was supposed to look thin, pale and sick but instead he turns into something monstrous and grin to me as I am the most delicious thing to eat. Then, the house started to turn strange. I mean, at the beginning, there were no grill all around the house, suddenly all the windows and door were locked with it. How strange that can be? It happened to be that our neighbor are not satisfied with the thing sent by someone and the thing is that they have to kill all of us. As if we were a part of a big secret (national secret). At the end, nobody manage to escaped but I found myself lying, being knock down by some girl and all I can say was...'I am a rabbit' (repeatedly)..sounds like a doll or robot...

It might sounds weird and no sense at all, but I was really scared back then in my dream and the fact that I can't save my family made me felt I'm useless, nothing but a selfish girl who won't do anything for some peoples so close to me. What did my dream trying to say to me? Or is it mere a dream? I don't have to worry about anything?? WELL, i Did worry when it hit me continuously, starting few years back....I can't recalled how many times..maybe I need to meet psychiatrist or counselor or maybe priest...or uncle Stephen Bong..(s0meone I knew from my sister)...that's all for now....see you next time..

I am A sTakeHolDer..

with time left just a second...seriously,second???? nah..I'm just kidding....really.. my pace is changing....lot of rumours saying that our courses are not yet being recognized by the authority...i'm not simply saying this, but..tired with this cakap kosong from the people who are supposed to take the responsibility regarding the recognition...don't want to say anything yet..it is to early to predict...eventhough I am a stakeholder...eventhough sometimes I felt I am responsible to take this matter to the court..really???? not really? I ain't have no idea about law.. I might get myself embarassed when I bring up the case......I am just kidding...there is nothing to worry about..this heck is just temporary..I am sure they know how to resolve this matter. After all, they were all masters holders and even PHd. just leave it to them..let them be...just like the old Malay saying '''biarkan Labu terjun dengan labu-labunya'''''....etc....